Vindication

    My heart feels as though it's just going to crush my ribs and burst through my chest.  My arms and legs feel like jello.  I am mindlessly walking around, not really aware of what I'm doing.  My job is so routine and the questions repetative that I feel like I can do them in my sleep, which is, essentially what I am doing.  My stomach is weightless as I feel as though a billion butterflies are trapped inside.  My head is pounding and aching. 
    When does justice come?  They say to those who wait...but I must say, I have been waiting a long time only to see the bandit escape with all of the treasure and left me bleeding and broken on the side of the road.  How is it that someone can get away with everything, and not do anything to promote his new found "wealth"? 
       Just when I think things are finally starting to go the way I need them too, that things are starting to work out and my patience and dilagence is starting to become recognised, my boat capsizes and i'm left drowning in the ocean.  I see the life boat and every time I try to swim to it, the current takes it further and further away, leaving me to drown.  It's hard to understand how you can spend so much time doing what you think is right, and what you feel is best, only to have it slammed back at you. 
     There are a million ways to describe it, like nice guys always finish last...that's about how I am feeling.  Defeated.  I finally feel stress free, well, not stress free, but I feel a lot lighter...happier...positive...like things are going to work out.  Like it's finally my turn to have something good happen.  Only it's not.  It's a cruel joke over and over again.  Like I'm stuck on April Fool's day and there's no tomorrow. 
     Hopeless...